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ccoasters:

ccoasters:

ccoasters:

ccoasters:

when i was 12 i made a deal with my dad that if i didn’t date until i was 16 he’d owe me $100 AND I FUCKING REMEMBERED THE OTHER DAY AND MY DAD SAID IT WAS "RIDICULOUS ENOUGH TO BE TRUE" HE’S ACTUALLY GONNA GIVE ME $100

so my dad come home today and was like “katie i did it i got your money” 

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ones 

he gave me 100 one dollar bills 

wait 

my dad gave me 100 one dollar bills 

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i can pretend to be a super star 

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i am a queen 

imagei made it rain on my mom

sir-hathaway:

gryffinpoor:

dudemanbropants:

gryffinpoor:

thepreciousthing:

the-ordinary-nerd:

ask-or-rp-with-will-petrisous:

squad16:

finalellipsis:

bestnatesmithever:

What if it bites me and it dies?

that means you’re poisonous. jesus christ, nate, learn to read.

What if it bites itself and I die?

It’s voodoo.

What if it bites me and someone else dies?

That’s correlation, not causation.

what if we bite each other and neither of us die

that’s kinky

oh my god

this is still my favorite text post collaboration ever

(Source: ultrafacts)

karkatsaysfuck:

etceteraface:

rycbar123-4:

So it’s my birthday and I’m opening gifts. I open the wrapped box from my uncle.

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I open the box, and find a $50 gift card, yes? But wait, there’s Styrofoam. There’s more.

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Then I remove the Styrofoam…

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The fuck?

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A FUCKING LEGLESS LEGO LEGOLAS

mY UNCLE GOT ME A LEGLESS LEGO LEGOLAS

bEST BIRTHDAY GIFT EVER

he then later gave me the legs.image

LEGO LEGOLAS’ LEGO LEGS

Are you Luna Lovegood

Loony Luna Lovegood Lavishly Loving LEGO Legolas’s LEGO Legs

(Source: faeryofficial)

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